Let Me Make Myself Clear!

I am not in a position to “suggest” or tell anyone to leave their 5-8 year relationship even if they aren’t married or engaged. No judging over here; when I stayed with my man for 6 years…If you decide to end your relationship it’s your choice!!!

When you read my blog and comments please don’t add what’s not there…COMPREHENSION is critical.

Now if you told me he was abusive (slapping you around and punching on you) then YES you should leave ASAP no question about that. However; if verbal or physical abuse is not an issue how the heck can I tell someone to leave? There are TWO sides to every story…

I merely posted a topic specifically about my life that some people assumed in some crazy deranged way that they should dump their boyfriends.
My life is exactly that…MY LIFE! Do whatever you choose and I have nothing to do with it. You are given my opinion ONLY and YOU have to make your OWN choice.
We are all adults so stop blaming others for choices that you make alone.

Update on my situation:
We decided to take a break so we can clear our minds to see if marriage is what we really need or want.
I believe if he couldn’t decide long ago it’s obvious this is a last-minute ploy he swears is not the case. Yes, he’s a GREAT NICE GUY but he’s not the only NICE GREAT GUY in the world.
Guess what? I am not blaming anyone about the decision we made together no matter what I was told to do not suggested!

People leave because they want to not because someone told them to…If that is the case they wanted to leave anyway or you are that weak to allow someone to (unbeknownst to them) to decide in your mind based on something you made up.

What a perfect excuse “I read 5 years no ring WTF? That’s why I left…smh

STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART, PATRICE

173 thoughts on “Let Me Make Myself Clear!

  1. Patrice gave some very sound advice. This is HER & HIS life they are both MATURE adults. I must say from the agreement they made he is a mature MAN. Don’t live your life base on hers. You don’t live with them. The love they share is different from the love you share with your man.

  2. It just say advisor but I just figured you was professional. Sorry I left cause I didn’t have a ring and I was going off your view since your older and I thought you new what is best. Sorry

  3. Patrice I think it’s great your sharing your life with the world but I think you made a huge mistake. You should not have put your current relationship in the blog. Anything that’s been trying to get with you now knows what’s going on and will be after you like flies on fruit. It’s going to be hard for you because people will be giving you there opinion but what they will be giving you them devils word not the positive side. I bet some people have been praying for this break up. Be careful but always remember you are on a vacation.

    • You are 1,000% correct…I have to say that even before I shared this those men were on me like flies anyway! Trust me!! I thought it was a mistake but not anymore…In order for people to trust and open up to me; I have to first…I have never cared what other’s thought about me and that isn’t always a good thing.
      You remind me of a friend I had named Will Norton…he was a good friend.

  4. Hello everyone before I get started I want to thank everyone for supporting my baby blog. Gregory your comments gave me some hope. I’ve dated Patrice for six years and I will admit she was the first woman I’ve ever fell in love with. Over the years of us being together we picked out a ring. But I never finished paying on it.

    Huge mistake I would always say I have to get her a ring and I just kept pushing it back. One day her mom made a comment I said I love Patrice and I will marry her any time any day. Which I should of dragged her to the court house mistake number two.

    I would tell lies and she would find out the truth mistake number three.

    I did finally in July 2013 put a ring on layaway for her that she will get next month. On Christmas Day we decided to make it work. For about two weeks she was into it but as time passed;
    I started to see the unhappy Patrice.

    It’s been hard to get her to talk to me. Finally today I made her talk to me. While we were in the car I asked her what’s going on with us and she said I told you I needed a break to clear my head. Now I love this woman like I love my mom so you can imagine how hard it is to give her a break. But I’ve been told if you love something to let it go and if it comes back it meant to be. Don’t get me wrong I have my life on the line hoping we get married but I’m being a mature man and giving her the break so she can clear her mind. Hopefully she has a change of heart and we can give her fans the pictures and details of our wedding.

    • Hello mr TW I saw your comment wow you actually admitted your wrongs. That’s a big step into becoming a better man. I bet she is perfect. I can tell that you just don’t love her your in love with her that make a huge difference. I hope you make her your wife I know there is a strong foundation between you too. Stay strong and believe in god and all things are possible. I hope to see you comment back to me.

    • Hello TW how are you brother. I’m a huge fan of Patrice blog. I’m proud of you as a man you admitted your wrongs. It takes a real man to own up to his mistakes and admit them to the world. If you don’t want to marry her let her go but if you want too step up to the plate and make it happen. She loves you and I’ll admit I can tell you love her because you admit you wrong. Make her your wife I hope to hear from you soon.

      • Fred you are a HUGE fan of my blog? Oh WOW!! I am cheesing over here big time. Thank you!!!
        When you back is against the wall you will admit to just about anything…but yes that was honorable of him.
        I am not sure if he is still reading my blog but if he is he will respond. Thanks Fred…

      • Patrice I have to disagree there a lot of men I know when there backs are against the wall they still lie. It take a real man to admit his wrongs that a sign of work in progress. I hope he does respond cause I would love to hear what he has to say.

      • Hello Fred 🙂

        First there is nothing in my comment that read that there are men who would NOT still lie if their back was against the wall…so there is nothing to disagree with. Some things are what I call “obvious” factors.

        Now, I love a good debate but it must have validity.

        If I had written that anyone who is lying will tell the truth if their back is against the wall would have warranted your response. We all know that is not true…people lie when a gun is held to their head…again, “obvious” factors.

    • Hello Mr TW how are you brother. I feel your pain and I know what your going thru. My woman lived with me for seven years playing the wife role and I didn’t get her a ring. As a man I take full responsibility for it. I’m pretty sure your doing the same thing being the fact you admitted your wrongs. That’s a huge step. Its hard for a lot of men to admit there wrongs. I hope Patrice gives you that chance to make her your wife. The fact you have five years together that’s a strong foundation and she did her wife duties and you did your husband duties as well if you didn’t she would have been left you. Communicate with her inform her you want to marry her. I wish you too the best. The love your shared with her should conquer all. Whatever other problems you may have just work towards making the right. I hope to hear from you and Patrice soon.

      • Simple Man,
        I don’t think he will respond anymore.
        I have a question for you…Why would you allow yourself to keep a woman around 7 years and not marry her? I understand she could have left long ago but her staying and you keeping her was that not enough?
        Remember, admitting wrongs does not erase them however they are forgiven.
        Forgiving someone does not mean you have to stay…HE did communicate he wanted to marry me it was just too late. I don’t owe him anything after 6 years of my life is gone.

        Straight from my Heart, Patrice
        ***Remember to search your own soul for specific answers.
        I sincerely thank everyone for reading my blog and sharing your views on life.
        All of my posts are personal lessons I’ve learned through my “personal” walk and life experiences.
        The purpose of my blog is to encourage others not intended for you to do as I do or say as I say.

    • Hello TW pray for her and pray for your relationship to get better between you two. There is a lot of love you and her have shared over these years make her your wife. Do what ever it takes to make her happy.

    • Hello Mr TW I sent Ms McCULLOUGH a message but it didn’t post does she still use this blog. Btw stay strong brother I been in your shoes ten year ago so I know what your going thru I post a message about it but it didn’t show I hope you get to read it. Think positive and pray to god.

  5. Hello Mr TW I will admit thank for your comment. I must say reading that I felt every word you said. I will say Patrice this man cherish the ground you walk on he is in love with you. He’s made mistakes and only a real man can own up to them. Keep your head up and I pray you and Patrice get back together it’s something special about this bond you and her share. Stop lying I was in your shoes.

  6. Hello TW we have been waiting on you to comment. I amazed you open up to the world about your mistakes and your sharing them with the world. It takes a real man to admit the truth. Thanks for sharing your side and you better give us that happy ending I want wedding pictures.

  7. Hello TW I’m in shock a man finally admits his wrong. That’s the start of being truthful. We all make mistakes in life we have to learn from them. From your comment I see you have learn you lesson. I hope she takes you back. To be honest we have a bet going that you and Patrice will get married at first I was hoping you two go your separate ways but now I’ve heard from you I’m on TW band wagon let go Patrice clear your mind get right and come back to Mr TW

  8. TW you fell for the oldest trick in the book I had to admit but she is gone champ. Good guys finish last and now another man will have your woman.

      • I read your post about five years and you said it was over that’s why I said your gone. Be honest and tell him it’s over

      • Lenny you are crossing the line now.
        Unless you have a crystal ball please stop.
        You have no idea nor do I what the future holds for us.
        Life has a funny way about things…

    • Hello Lenny first off your a young immature man. This blog is for grown folks. See TW is a mature man that respects his woman that why he giving her space cause deep down inside he want her to be his wife and when our women want something a real man gives her what she want because he want her happy. Remember this Lenny happy wife equals happy life.

  9. Mr TW and Patrice I need a break from my man could you talk to him and explain to him that a break doesn’t mean I’m gone forever. I really need some space from him.

    • Sara it was MY idea to take a break.
      I am not sure about your situaiton. But whatever you decide to do be careful…not all men will accept you “taking a break”
      I don’t want any harm to come your way.
      Some folks don’t know how to let go.

      • He doesn’t want to let go what should I do? How did you get him to understand the break? How did you explain it to him that he understood.

      • Sara it was not easy at first believe me! I lost sleep and weight worrying about this man.

        I was honest with him about how I felt but not at first because I was afraid and uncertain.

        I did tell him over the years to stop doing certain things and what I did not like…I am very vocal when it comes to matters…

        TW did not accept it at first…I guess he saw something that let him know I was hurting and needed space. Playing house took its toll on me pure and simple amongst other issues we had.

      • He doesn’t want to let go what should I do? How did you get him to understand the break? How did you explain it to him that he understood. He’s acts out every time I tell him I need space let’s take a break

  10. Btw TW I’m on your side. Because your giving her some space and I respect a man than grants a woman wish. Patrice I always root for the women but in the case I’m on your man side.

    • Sara,
      I wish I could tell you what to do but I can’t…I can tell you what I am going to do…this does not mean you do as I do.
      Then again, it’s best you decide on your own.
      Your heart and your mind will be in sync…this will tell you to come back…staying is totally up to you my dear.
      In life there is no right or wrong answer it all depends on what you want not anyone else.

    • James it’s not that simple. After 2-3 years if he loved me so much we would have been married with or without a ring.
      I gave him 6 long years to decide that is more than enough. I am no spring chicken…I am 43 years old..

      • That man admit his mistake and knows were he went wrong. Work with him I know 6 years there but don’t throw it away. I can tell from his comment you hold the key to his heart and the relationship sis I will tell you to go but something is telling me to tell you to stay

      • You really don’t know everything. I can NOT share all the details and will not out of respect for him.

        The world is watching and trust me I know what I am doing…If this is a mistake which I doubt it…I am woman enough to deal with it.

        I have to worry about me since nobody else cares about how I feel.

      • Please don’t attack Patrice it’s my fault we are not together. She is a perfect woman. I just hope and pray I get another chance with this perfect woman. She is not to blame. If you want to blame someone please blame and attack me.

      • I don’t know about that perfect stuff but he’s right that you guys need to chill with all that stuff.
        It’s crazy how most people love to say things to make me appear to be this bad person.
        That’s so not cool…both of us are the cause it takes TWO.

      • Both of you all so if he’s willing to fix it sis give it a try. If it’s sex they have classes. If it’s money see where you both can cut back if it’s lies he learning from that. Think about it.

      • He claims he been paying on a ring tell him to take you to see it. He said we would marry you any place why didn’t you go to the court house? Pull his card on the ring and see what happens. If he has a ring I think you can save it

      • …funny how people can give advice when they in fact aren’t experiencing the situation and never will…I never speak on anything that I have not gone through myself ; it only seems right…A ring nor marriage will fix us at this point… it would be a patch.

  11. No sis no one thinks your chopped liver. A lot of your fans saw what he posted and when a man can admit his wrongs and mistakes that shows he’s mature and growing. That guy loves you and we don’t to see your relationship end. Thank about what old head was saying. You agreed and even said you would try his way. I know it’s hard but I think we all see something you may not see just because your tired and drain. Sis it’s a new year start fresh with him.

      • No sis your feelings does matter. I feel your pain but as African American couples a lot of people view us as unstable can’t hold a job or maintain a good relationship so when we see something that’s worth saving we try our best to save it. I think a lot of your fans and people want to see you too married no split up. I read the comments and people want a movie they talk about it on social media. It’s your life I think we all see something worth saving.

      • Things are not always as they seem…I know what you mean trust me..but If I am not happy what else can I do?
        I am not a spoiled brat never asked him for anything…I am not materialistic none of that…I just wanted him to not lie and respect me enought to marry me years ago not when I am about to leave….that is crazy!

  12. Patrice what I see here since I’ve read your comments and his. I feel your going back and forth in your head about staying or leaving. I think some days you want the break and on other days you don’t. Maybe you do need a break. I’m pretty sure you live together. Don’t break up your home pack a bag go stay with your mom dad or sister or brother. I see a lot of positive things here. Think about how hard it was for him to give his side. But he did he knows his mistakes. I think from the mistakes and he admits them half your battle is won all you have to do is go see a counselor and I can bet they are going to tell you to stay. Only because you have something to work with in him. We as your fans Gregory and myself are professionals this advice we are giving can’t be wrong.

    • That patch will help cover the wound while the rest of your relationship gets heal and you work on the problem Patrice make it work.

    • Professionals and actually living through it all can’t compare in my eyes.
      Are you wrong? Absolutely not…but what you must both understand is that it took me to LEAVE for him to admit or decide to change. I endured so much for 6 years. That’s exactly why I would never speak to a “Professional” about my life when I know what’s best for me.
      You see I prayed on it….that’s all I need.

      • I’m sorry you lived thru six years of hell I’m on your side leave it’s not worth it.

  13. Hello Ms Patrice I’m Stanford teacher at UCLA he told me about your blog and asked me to share my professional advice with you. You are hurt and sometimes that hurt and pain clouds our judgement. I’ve read your comments for the five year post and this post. You have said great things about him. I see his finally comment on what going on. I will say it takes a lot of men to admit there wrong and he just did half you battle is won. I really thank your relationship is worth saving. I as women we put up this brick wall when we are in the state of mind your in. I’m coming to you as a woman and telling you I know there are other issues that you both are not talking about but I think you need a neutral party to show it’s work saving. I’m pretty you still love together go seek a professional person if you don’t believe me. I’m just giving you a woman’s point of view.

  14. yes but love is more powerful than lies, i think something good will come out of the temporary break up, my husband and i broke up for a minute back in the day and got back together, got married and started a family. our marriage is still standing strong since 1999, we have our issues just like any married couple but we resolve it and move on, there is nothing on this earth that can have enough power to separate us, after all we are soulmates, met him at the age of 17, he has been my best friend ever since, there is nothing that he wouldnt do for me and vice versa, he has always and will always have my best interest at heart, anything we go thruough we go through together, there is no “I” in this team, we are raising 2 beautiful young girls, he is the best father, and we just had a son 2 years ago, one reason i decided really wanted a son because i truly wanted a carbon copy of him, he deserves a son and he is very proud to be a Senior to his Junior! well i could go on and on, but i will end here, Patrice, good luck, and i wish u nothing but the best in your relationship, love will lead you in the right direction!!

  15. patrice i agree when u say that if a man wants to marry you he will, my husband and i talked about marriage, but didnt make any hard decisions, i didnt think he was thinking about marriage as seriously as i was, well it turned out that while i was dreaming of a church wedding, i didnt know that he had his own agenda, behind my back he planned the perfect wedding for us (at the courthouse), he made plans with my co-worker and supv for me to leave work early, told me he was taking me to lunch, walked into my job with a suit and tie, told me to change so we could go to lunch, he never got down on one knee and proposed which is how he really surprised me because he proposed as we were in the car on the way to the courthouse, tears flowed down my cheeks so quickly, overcome by joy, our wedding song- Musiq “Dont Change”, it played on the radio as we were headed to get married, and this song is all about us as we still sing this song to each other to this day, many brides dream of that big wedding, but i am happy that my husband did it exactly the way that he did, it made it more intimate as the two of us stood there and exchanged vows, it didnt matter that where we were getting married, what mattered is that HE grabbed my hand and TOOK me to be his wife, at that very moment i knew i had met my soulmate besides other factors, no one on this earth could make that decision for him, when he was ready, he did just wat he felt was right, we are planning our 20 year wedding anniversary by renewing our vows with our children present, our girls will be my bridesmaids, son will be ring bearer, i have to say, this man has made mistakes, but love has taken over, i know his heart, i know he loves me (he told me he loves me before i even thought of telling him, in the car taking me to work one day) if he does anything wrong he makes it right and thats what i admire about him, we have grown together to become a better person with the love, respect and honesty

  16. I’m a friend of Patrice I’ve know her for over ten years. I had no idea her Tim was breaking up. I’m in shock because I thought she would have asked me my view on the situation. Tim seems like a great guy from the few times I met him. He admitted to the wrongs he has done. Only god will know if she truly forgives him. Don’t get it wrong I’m Patrice friend first I love her like a sister and I will admit you both complement each other well. I remember bumping into him and he had just put money down on the ring. I was so over whelmed with joy that she was about to get married I wanted to call but I promised to keep it a secret. Fast forward I want to know the truth. I understand wanting a break and space but that could hurt the relationship more than it could help it. If money is the problem with the wedding I’ll pay for it.

  17. Hello Patrice six years in a bad relationship is not worth it. How did you stay for that long in a dead beat relationship from day one you wasn’t happy why didn’t you leave? Why are you even thinking about revisiting this after six years of hell?

    • LeAnn it wasn’t hell. Just the things I discussed and what he shared.
      I felt used playing house. At my age telling folks I have a boyfriend is embarrassing!
      6 years is more than enough time for any man to make a woman his wife.

      • I understand where you are coming from. I’m not going to bore you with a long comment TW if you want her to be your wife take her to the court house. Patrice if this wasn’t worth saving girl I would tell you to go but my heart and spirit say the opposite. Deep down you know he’s the one but the emotions and the anger is coving it up. You have six years turn that six into life time commitment with him. He said he would marry you clear your head and make it happen.

      • Leann you could never bore me with your comment no matter how long it is.
        Your comments have substance…I hear you loud and clear and appreciate you taking the time of your day to respond.
        However; I wish it were that easy…I am so hurt and no ring or wedding can heal that…you have no idea…

  18. First off I’m keep it 100% your weak for letting her go. I know Patrice and if your soft she going to run over you and that’s what she did. She is gone and best believe the next man see you mistake she will be married in three years with kids. Women tell that stuff to smooth men heart and feelings KISS bye because dudes are inline to get what you had.

      • Patrice I’m a realist you are leaving him face it. We both know it. There are men that know you and glad your single cause your about to become there wife. The big mistake you made was putting your business in the street. I hate to say but TW she’s gone champ. I know you Patrice I can name 15 guys that want you and I will bet you will marry one of them in two to three years. You exposed his wrongs TW is finished time for him to cry like a baby

      • I have no regrets. There are several women wasting their LIFE waiting for a man to marry them and 10 years later they still aren’t married…I won’t be that woman.
        Oh wow! Really? To be honest, I haven’t had a break always been in some type of relationship…maybe I need a break but it’s so crazy out here who wants to be alone?
        A little ME time is exactly what I need. I am not going to date anyone…

  19. Patrice reading your comments you know your not going to get back with him so why tell him you need a break instead of just saying it’s over? You said the world is watch and if this is a mistake you doubt it and if it is your woman enough to deal with it. How can you say no one else cares when we all read your post and comment. I we are just telling you to make it work does that mean we don’t care about you?

    • Regina if I knew I would tell him…Things can change can we just wait and see instead of being negative?
      When I say it seems nobody cares about my feelings it’s because when folks say STAY it’s like he did no wrong…I am NOT perfect but I tried to be a good woman to him…I cooked, cleaned made sure that man had a meal every night…If I did not feel like cooking I took him out to eat. Just to name a few…

      • Patrice you are PERFECT he said it. Why deny it. Marry that man clear your head and send me my invite.

  20. Your perfect to him because that’s the way he see you and no one can change that. Your his perfect woman it’s going to hurt him to give you that break but I promise you that man going to love you harder while you are away from him

      • Give him that chance and I bet you will be married before January 24,2014 that man knows his mistake let him correct them. God forgives us for our sin and wrong and we get chances to correct ourselves before we meet him. So give him that chance to correct his wrong.

      • Let that man correct his mistake. I bet you will be married tomorrow. I see you have other issues but you being married weights a lot on your heart. He wants to marry you so let him. I feel you and him share something special. Make the rest our y’all lives together magical.

      • Patrice I’m on the fence with this. I don’t want to tell you anything wrong I’ve been thinking about this for 4 hours I’ve called a few friends and we had conference calls. The number answer all the females said was if she give him another chance and they don’t get married in a week she needs to leave. Amy said tell her to take a weeks vacation to clear her heart and feelings because her heart may be cloudy. DR Richard said make it work the devil wants to see you apart. I said go get married it may be a patch but that patch will help heal the wounds and you both can work on the other problems. He’s willing to make it work so you do the same.

      • The devil was in it for 6 years or we would have been married. I wanted to get married 3 years ago…he claimed it was financial but I am certain if he had gone to our closest friends and family they would have helped him. Besides I didn’t need a ring to get married…I could have waited. 6 years later I had to walk out the door to get him to marry me…I don’t feel good about that at all…it’s like giving him an ultimatum…not cool.

      • Patrice I’m here TW it’s a wrapped. To all Patrice fans let her leave there are guys waiting on her. Give us our chance.

      • Mr TW comment on why Patrice is perfect. Bad man stop trying to ruin TW chances you wouldn’t like it if you was in his shoes.

  21. I’m glad I don’t bore you. Don’t knock it because that’s one thing you didn’t try. I’m ask you what do you parents and friends say about him? Patrice I will be honest I feel if you leave your not coming back and I don’t want to see that happen. How about this does the good out weigh the bad? Let’s start here.

    • My friends support my decsion because they know all the details that I can’t share.
      However, TW shared that he lied and a few other things so that is all that can be said.
      Some things are better left unsaid…but what he shared on his own was good enough and the fact that he waited so long.
      Leann you know how a person can buy you the world but it’s not what you really need, asked for or want?
      Or you know that what is missing isn’t something that is impossible to have but they just can’t seem to get it right?
      Men become arrogant when you allow them to waste your time; they think you will never leave…well surprise.

  22. Hello Patrice how are you I’m Gregory wife. He’s been up all on your blog so we he asked me to read it and share my comment. Yes me and Gregory took a break but I had a lot of pressure from work and family problems but it wasn’t because of Greg. I’m a woman the same age as you and I will admit I feel your pain and understand where you are coming from. I think you want a break to clear your heart and make sure your making the right decision. I understand you don’t want to make the wrong decision or waste anymore time. After reading TW comments he wants you to be his wife. He realize his mistakes and I’m a woman that when a man can admit his wrongs and is willing to correct them I will give him that one chance. But again that’s me. I say work it out only because I support my beautiful black sister when they have something good. He may no be perfect but who is besides YOU . He has learn I and bet you that.

    • Thank you 🙂 Even you took a break and yes I have some issues outside of him that I need to deal with as well. Funny you said that…But I am feeling cornered right now…I need time away…

  23. I thought his mom told me you and him was working it out what happen? She is still hurt from a few weeks ago this going to really hurt her.

    • She’s the reason why I thought about staying. I felt so bad when it came to him and her that I was about to not care about my feelings. I can’t do that…Can you let him tell her instead of you. Thank you.

  24. You know when tell a child don’t touch that fire or you will get burn. You turn your head and they touch it and get burn. Sister I see something special and I don’t want to see the devil take it away.

  25. Patrice are you taken the break because you have other issues you have to working on or is it to get Away from him. Are you taken the break to really see if you want to marry him.

  26. Wow I was just asking him when are we hanging out I haven’t seen you since my wedding. Damn nick said he’s been asking very strange and being distance at work. Is there anything we can do to help?

      • Yes I agree he does. Nick expressed a lot of concern he did say a lot of people notice. He tries to hide it but it shows on his eyes and face when I saw him today I told nick I would reach out to you. So did the birthday party get cancel or it’s still on? My you should each out to his best friend to talk to him.

      • No party…Tell Nick to give him as much support as he can. I am sorry but this is getting to be too much…if it was that serious he should have married me long ago. Finances is a poor excuse…I would have understood the ring could have come later…

  27. Hello Patrice I was introduce to your blog thru a friend. Let me just say mirror. All that you have said I have been thru. I took the break from my seven year relationship and I will admit it was hard. I need it to clear my head from all aspects of life. Here I am today with one regret the break. See I wanted the same as you and I was thinking the same way as you 🙂 during my break he gave me my space but I knew he really wanted to make it right by making me his wife. So I called him and said let meet for dinner so he agreed. On his way to meet me he got in a car accident and lost his life 😦 the pain I felt that day and after I was going to tell him come back home. I’m not saying don’t do I think it can really do you some good. But please don’t just forget about him. Send a text to check on him and to let him know your still honoring the bond and agreement you have. He going to really break down when he comes home the first weeks and your not there. There was a few time I had to go to the hospital because he had nervous break down. I even had to save him from going into a mental health hospital. That’s when I realize a text would help him. A lot of men are strong but there biggest weakness is the woman they love and cherish. The fact he calls you perfect says a lot. Don’t push him away or distance your self. I hope this helps you I’m on my lunch break but I’ll chalk to you later. Just last night my brother girlfriend left him he drink some bleach. Just realize his weakness is his heart and you own that heart right now.

    • Wendy this is great information and WOW!
      If they feel so strongly why do they not marry us?
      I really don’t see the logic behind it.
      Thank you VERY much for taking time to comment you are a huge help…and I look forward to more advice.
      7 years you say? hmmmm? How did that make you feel?
      Well, I guess the break you took explains that.
      The car accident? He’s ok right?

  28. All of you have been great…I appreciate your feedback very much. This is a life altering experience. Thank you for not JUDGING me for those who did not. I’ve never worried about what people thought about me and I care about others that may be having the same issue that I am having….

  29. He died on his way to meet me for dinner in a car accident. The same day I was going to tell him let’s make it work. I asked why didn’t we get married in court he said baby I want to give you the best wedding. I did understand that but hey I just want to be his wife. I felt like I wasted my time but that break girl I missed his company all the little things he did wash my car oil change take out trash what man you know cleans the bathroom better than a woman. One night I was in the bed alone I was like Wendy he wants to marry you it’s not like he said no go to the court house get marry and work on the issues you have as a couple and I did but I never got a chance to tell him. When I seen him in the casket I didn’t recognize him he lost so much weight from stress.

  30. It’s ok I’m still dealing with it. Life has been a struggle. I never realize how the little things he did meant so much. Joy I been thru that stage it is ruff stay strong and there will be sleepless nights. If there is a will there is a way.

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