I sincerely apologize if my post “Take a Seat” offended anyone.
Lord knows my intention is not to offend anyone. I have over 160 posts, are you serious?
Some folks are always looking for a fight.
My posts are not directed towards anyone in particular since I have no idea who is actually reading my blog.
This is an open forum in which I should not have to walk on egg shells when posting my personal thoughts and feelings that have nothing to do with any of you who are “offended’ by my personal feelings.
Please whatever you do don’t take anything “personal” when it’s not about you. This blog is about MY life alone. I am able to answer and give some sound advice on things that I have “personally experienced”.
I write about what others are afraid to share fearing the backlash or negative responses that most will have. All advice that my followers left under 5 Years No Ring WTF? were welcomed and some were not…So indeed some folks needed to back off in some cases.
You can either be NEGATIVE or POSITVE while reading my blog…take the higher road. My blog is not for overly sensitive people who always think someone is attacking them on a personal level.
You all have no idea how many comments that are ugly received that never hit my page for you to see.
The one thing I will not allow on my blog is outright disrespect. Hurting people or toying with their emotions isn’t my thing either.
You speak your peace and respect my decision. Don’t indirectly refer to me as being stupid or not realizing when I have a good thing in my life.
NONE OF US ARE PERFECT AND MAKE MISTAKES…
I am just not afraid to share the mistakes I’ve made with hopes someone else won’t do the exact thing!
That’s a sacrifice that I’ve chosen to make…
Today at 10:16 AM
Go morning Patrice how are you? I have a tough question for you. I’ve dated this guy for six years. I love this man with all my heart. He’s helped me in ways I can never repay him. When I first met him I was renting a room. My bills were pass due my credit was bad I was on down on my luck. I was living from pay check to pay check. I met Curtis and he was such a nice guy way to nice if you ask me. You know how dating in the DMV area is. He was different so I decided to give him a chance we started to date after two months he asked me to move in so we could build a life together. So I moved in and I was so use to paying half the rent with my ex boyfriends but he told me I’ll pay the rent you buy the food and together we will get you out of debt and build your credit. Things were going good he had little issues like he would come in late at night. He didn’t call or text me when he was out. He would tell lies. Our sex life change and went down hill. 😦 I love that man so I forgave him for his wrongs because no one is perfect. As time went on I got close to his family especially his mom. But he came from a great family being that mines is so broken and we don’t get along. They all welcome me with open arms and they all loved me. Than he fucked up and cheated on me. I was so hurt and numb that could not function at work. I told him I need a break and I moved out. His mom would call and text me and told me how much she loves me and wish her son had never cheated on me. Last year I ran into him at the mall and he asked if still need more time on the break I said yes and he said I love you still. Patrice all those feelings and emotions came back. Is that a sign he’s the one for me? Than he said my mom is very sick you should go see her. That really hurt to hear she was sick I left the mall and went to see her. I would visit her once a week she would always say your my daughter in law and I love you. Those words touch my soul in ways I can’t describe. Three months ago I went to see her she looked me in my eyes and say Tiffany I want be here much longer but I will watch over you in heaven and she said my son is in love with you and so is our whole family. She said do me a favor could you please forgive my son and make it work and marry him because you made him the great man he is today. I had tears in my eyes. After that she was gone. Those was her last words and request. What should I do? Should I honor her last wish? God knows I love that woman like she was my mom. I’m 45 and my luck with dating hasn’t been to good. I still love him. I talk to him last week and he promise no more lies or cheating he said he will gone a church and that he’s been working on becoming a better man. Have you ever got so close to your befriend family that when you and him break up it feels like your breaking up with the family? Im pretty sure you can relate to this when you meet a man and he gives you his all and loves you and fights for your heart but you are so stressed out and numb you can’t think with a clear head and all you want is to be alone to clear your mind and think freely. Ive tried dating but you can never get a complete package because I love a lot of stuff he use to do for but other men lack but they have qualities he didn’t have. This will blow your mind me and Curtis never fussed or fight had disagreements but that’s it. How many people can say they have had that in a relationship. Since I’ve left him he has become a better man I can look in his eyes and see he still has that desire for me. Plus I’m not getting any younger. I’m at a tug a war shine some light so my next move will be my best move.
I am doing great thanks for asking 🙂
I have to be honest with you in this situation its tough alright…If I were you based on what you shared with me today…I’d give him another chance.
The fact that you had his mother’s blessings and your feelings are still the same when it comes to your heart is a very good sign. He still loves you too!
You dated this guy for 6 years and you never mentioned that you wanted to be married nor engaged…ok that is totally fine not judging you at all.
Be open to what I am about to write:
I understand you were both in a relationship but he is not your husband or fiancée’ so in my world he has a right to sleep with who he wants to since he is not committed to you totally. We agree to be monogamous; with so much temptation that is sometimes utterly impossible for the weak flesh.
Ask him why he cheated and what can you do to make sure he never does it again? He’s in church great start very proud of him. Attend church with him take it slow and don’t have sex with this dude without a condom!!!!!!!!!!
I know it sounds bad but its reality. We get caught up in wanting to own folks that we forget that we can actually do as we please until we are married or engaged.
My ONLY concern would be whether he respected himself enough to use protection. If he valued your life and health enough to use a condom with this fling…NOW! If he went up in this chick RAW DOG that would be a NEGATIVE to stay if that were done to ME!
Please get both of you tested and have him use protection at all times if you decide to stay. They always say once a cheater always a cheater but I don’t believe that holds true to everyone. “Better Safe than SORRY”…Don’t worry about what others say that you have told if you decide to get back with him…if you have not told anyone keep it that way. Cheating to me is a deal breaker but I also know that we make mistakes as human beings. Cheating to me is an unforgivable offense BUT it all depends on the situation and the man!!!
***Remember to search your own soul for specific answers.
I sincerely thank everyone for reading my blog and sharing your views on life.
All of my posts are personal lessons I’ve learned through my “personal” walk and life experiences.
The purpose of my blog is to encourage others and in no way will I ever directly tell anyone to do anything because the decision is yours and yours alone.
I advise this does not mean you make a decision based solely on what is communicated to you via my blog. My responses are based on “What I would do” if I were you; based on my personal experiences. In the end, the decision is totally yours and something you will have to live with not me. If someone told you to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you? If so, stop reading my blog. Thank you!
Straight from my Heart, Patrice
Thanks for your response Dawn is my first name Tiffany is my middle. I we were engage at the time. We got engage in our six year. To be honest I wasn’t going to take him back because if your in a committed relationship with or without a ring cheating is cheating that’s a unforgivable to me also. The pressure I’m having is his moms last words before she died was please forgive my son for what he did. I got over it and forgave him. Making it work and marry him that’s what I’m not to sure about. How can I find the right answer. It’s hard because I love him mom so much and we got along perfect. I ask someone they told me put myself in her shoes. Her last words on earth was please marry my son 😦
God rest her soul…but you are the only one who has to live with him So if you decide to stay…Let your choice be based on YOU and YOU alone.
Your style is very unique compared to other people I have read stuff from. Thanks for posting when you’ve got the opportunity, Guess I’ll just bookmark this blog.
“Unique” that’s a good thing…:)