I find it both amusing and sad that most people believe that a history with a person that is filled with pain is a way to rationalize having a half of man/woman being better than having no man/woman at all.
If you have to fight, cry and be walked on like a doormat that’s the kind of history you don’t want; nor does it prove your love to stick around to be used and abused daily.
Sometimes we experience situations in life that will make us question our self-worth if you can step outside of yourself for a moment to actually realize it.
We claim to respect and love ourselves but we allow others to throw us out like Monday’s trash or flatten us like a steam roller; then have the nerve to profess our love to them after being thrown under bus right before they rip your heart out of your chest.
I wonder if we really like to feel pain; otherwise why wouldn’t be just tell the loser to get lost? The first lie, the first cry from being hurt beyond repair should be lesson enough but we keep enduring it for days that turn into months and one day it’s years!
You become so mentally and emotionally worn out that you will no longer be any good for the next person if you don’t give yourself time to heal and focus on loving and respecting yourself FIRST.
It may sound corny when your hear folks say “love yourself first” but that’s a FACT!
How can you allow someone to mistreat you and give them your heart? I am sure there are many reasons you would give but none that would make any logical sense. She/he used to be so nice or we have a history together is surely what they say most of the time.
History means nothing if he beats on you…History means nothing if she cheats on you. What they used to do and used to be like means zero what matters is how they are presently treating you.
Never use kids as an excuse to stay in an unhealthy relationship because when you think you are doing the kids a favor you are doing them a disservice. Kids are smart and they can sense when their parents aren’t happy and they talk about it in their adult life too.
Trying to love someone that actually hates themselves is a never ending battle you don’t want to start. Now just imagine two people getting together and they have no self-love…that is a huge disaster waiting to happen unless they are open to change and willing to love and accept being loved in return.
When its’ all said and done every experience is a lesson so you aren’t dumb because you fell once or twice for the wrong person but if you repeat the same behavior than you should question yourself.
Make sure you are where you need to be mentally and emotionally before you drag someone into your life…
Patrice McCullough 